A better me

Over this past year I have written a lot about the many years  I spent fighting with myself, and God, about my anxiety. I hated it. Felt weakened by it, and was angry I had been “cursed” with such a burden. I was even more upset by the fact that He never took it away. I spent years trying to find out what I had done wrong and as a result my suffering felt endless.

However, this year I have finally realized that it is not a curse. It is a true blessing. A blessing that I never noticed until now. I am able to use it to help those around me who suffer from the same affliction. I have become more passionate. More loving. More understanding. And more thankful because of my anxiety. I feel that I have become a better me because of it. Anxiety is not who I am, but it will always be apart of who I am. It is something I have embraced because I must first love myself before I can truly love those around me.

I am not saying that anxiety is easy, because it is not. I have very painful days, but in those moments I try to remember that I will overcome. I am stronger. I am better. I have finally been able to embrace the strength that God has given me to overcome!