Yesterday I spent most of the night in the ER, and today our pregnancy has ended with a miscarriage. 

We were only six weeks along, but I am finding that within that short time I was able to fall in love with a little embryo. I feel so many emotions and it I difficult to sort through them. However, even though I do not feel hope, I know God has a plan. Honestly, I  don’t understand how He can have a plan for all of this, and I may never understand. But I will continue to have faith, even in my doubt. 


57 thoughts on “Miscarriage

  1. I am so, so sorry for your loss. That must be so devastating. I’ve never been pregnant, but I’ve heard that so many women keep silent about miscarriages, that it can actually be really debilitating. I don’t know whether that’s true or not, but if it is, I’m so glad that you feel you can speak out, despite the devastation you must currently be feeling.
    Again, I’m so, so sorry for your loss. I wish you all the best.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I have been finding that the more I talk about it, the easier it is to cope. My husband and I have been talking a lot about our emotions and it has really helped. There are lots of women who struggle talking about it. I dont like talking about it with others outside of my blog, but it helps writing

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m so glad. I mean, it’s unbelievably terrible, but I’m so glad that talking, at least, is helpful. I’m so, so sorry for your loss and I wish you and your husband the best for the future.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I share in your grief. I support you in your strength. I am mother to three spirit children, who each left around the third month of being here. I can’t say that I don’t miss the life they would have had here. But I can tell you that they are with me every day of my life, helping me navigate this life, and waiting to reunite with me in heaven to tell me all the things they learned from their special vantage point.
    I will never have to be the parent who worries if my child is safe, or well cared for, or lost, or lonely. They have the perfect life we all long for. I helped birth them to get there.
    I’m sorry I don’t have the answer to your questions. I still have questions, too. But I also have faith. And that is what gets me through until I have my answers.
    I wish you peace, and joy, and everything one associates with Easter. It must have been very hard for Mary when she lost her son. But imagine her joy when she realized he really had not left her. I hope you can know that joy, too.

    Liked by 3 people

      • The last thirty years has helped me process the loss. I have been a “mother” to countless students, the favorite eccentric auntie, the godmother and “adopted” mom of both neighborhood kids and foreign exchange students. I even mother people who are older than me. My maternal instincts did not go to waste. Neither will yours.
        It’s wonderful to have your own flesh and blood children…and I wish that for you. But I’m sure you share a piece of your heart with many young ones in and outside the classroom. Your personal loss is lessened by the satisfaction of knowing that.
        Prayers for you, your husband, and your forever angel.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Keeping you in my heart. When I miscarried the entire world seemed to end and I couldn’t imagine how I would tell others let alone how I would go on. It seemed that supportive women came out of nowhere sharing their stories of loss with me. I never knew. I wasn’t alone. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I am so very sorry. 😦 I have been following your pregnancy since you announced it, and I could feel your happiness. I am deeply sorry for this loss. Sending you love. ❤


  5. I’m so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it can get at times. I’ve had two miscarriages and I’ve never forget them, just remember that it wasn’t their time, everything happens for a reason; no matter how much it hurts. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I hope to encourage you with this, although I’ve never gone through the pain of a miscarriage, I have a sister who has gone through several. SO many woman go through miscarriage of their first, but go on to have normal pregnancies after that. You were able to get pregnant, that is a hopeful thing. Praying for you and your husband. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Faith is at its strongest in doubt– it is what defines us. Love and prayers to you and your husband as you process this. I have lots of respect for Dr. Jessica Zucker and how she frames working through pregnancy loss (having been there myself): http://modernloss.com/pregnancy-loss/. I also find comfort and catharsis in her instagram feed: https://www.instagram.com/p/BDJaJRPKnXz/?taken-by=ihadamiscarriage

    Peace be with you.

    Liked by 1 person

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