Why does a number define us?

Why is it that when I weigh myself, I suddenly feel completely and utterly defeated. I find myself sinking into the mentality that I am less of a woman if the number I see on the scale does not match what I perseve to be perfection. Why is it that I can stand on a scale for 30 seconds and my entire day can be ruined? Why do I allow that number define who I am as a woman? 

I weighed myself today and was devastated by the number I saw staring back at me. I lost an entire evening with my husband to anxiety and anger because of some stupid number. How ridiculous is that?!

I wish I could elequently profess that the number means nothing to me, and curse the society that created a false sense of feminine perfection. But I can’t. Although, I know, and understand, in my rational mind that weight does not define someone’s worth, I have, nevertheless, fallen victim to our society’s brainwashing. I bashfully admit that I internally idolize movie stars for their perfect shapes and flawless glamour. I have found myself wishing I could look like them, because, you’re happy if you’re skinny. Right? 

Even writing those words makes me cringe, but in the darkest recesses of my mind, perhaps it is what I think. Over the years, countless perfect bodies have been depicted on tv shows, movies, ads, and social media that my mind has come to expect this perfection out of myself, and when I have failed time and time again to atain it – I feel unworthy. I feel that my husband won’t love me as much. I won’t do as well at my job. My friends won’t want to hang out with me. No one will ever find me attractive. 

These are thoughts that so many of us share, and it has to stop. We have to know that our worth is NOT measured by the number on the scale. We can and will be loved no matter what shape we are or how many rolls we have. We have to come together and build each other up. Tell someone they are beautiful today. Even better, look in the mirror and tell that to yourself. Look at every inch of yourself and say you are beautiful. Because You Are. 

22 thoughts on “Why does a number define us?

  1. So true. This was so great to read. I feel the exact same. Sometimes I just avoid the scales for months because I can’t handle it.


  2. I hate the scales, but kinda love them too 😦 I always try to keep things in perspective, like for example, at any given time, 2-3kgs of your weight is in fact bacteria in your gut, so really, what are we weighing. Maybe today i have an extra kg of bacteria…not fat..or whatever. I dont know.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I don’t know if this will help, but I have been reading about positive and negative goals. Positive goals being a goal to do something vs negative goals a goal to not do something. For me, I think losing weight has been a negative goal ie eat less etc. Now I am trying to focus on positive goals and helping my body to do more ie run further. It’s put me in a better place mentally πŸ™‚ But I feel you, the scale is the devil haha


  4. It’s very possibly to know something logically, but still be affected by it emotionally. Lord knows this is my life in a nutshell. For example, I know that some peoples’ opinions don’t matter, but they still bother me.

    With respect to weight, I’ve found that knowledge is power. In following many, many bloggers who have dissected and broken down the weight loss myths, I’ve discovered a great measure of peace. Like knowing that 95% of people gain back any weight they’ve lost. Like realizing how biased society, even doctors, are against fat people. Like realizing that fat is not a bad word, nor are fat and attractive mutually exclusive. Like realizing that you cannot tell a damn thing about someone’s health status from their size. This is really helped me a great deal, because most of the things we’re taught about weight is completely bunk, and society holds up this impossible idea. In knowing this I’ve become far kinder to others and by extension myself. I DO still have a weight goal, but it is far higher than most would consider “acceptable.” I couldn’t care less, because if I follow a healthy diet and exercise, then I’m doing what’s necessary to take care of my body. Also, you don’t owe health to anyone to be treated with respect.

    Ah TL;DR logic doesn’t mean you won’t be emotionally affected, but regardless of that number or your size, you are still a worthy human being πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Forget tv and movies. They are not anywhere close to the average size. The average size is a 12-14. Funny how they consider that plus size. Their standards are outrageously false. Focus on eating well and exercising and the rest will follow. I’m sure you are beautiful.


  6. Yeah, this is pretty much my life. Which is part of why I blog….

    I could tell you all the usual stuff, that no one can “see” your number, no one judges you based on your gravitational pull, and the tags are sewn on the INSIDE for a reason. But…yeah. I feel ya.

    Liked by 1 person

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