Today I drove my brother to the airport at Las Vegas, which is a few hours from where I live, and I had zero anxiety! It was such a smooth and relaxing drive, which I really needed since my time as been devoted to caring for my newborn daughter – She stayed at home with daddy. listened to music and sang as loud as I could! It was fantastic!
Two and a half years ago, On a family trip to Vegas, I was unable to get on a bus because it induced a panic attack. It was a really low moment for me because I had never let my family see how bad my anxiety had gotten. However, shortly after the event, I decided to take a huge step and talk to my doctor about what I can do to help. He started medication, Paxil, and it was the best decision I ever made. I have not had a panic attack since that vacation!
So today felt really special since, considering what I had experienced two years earlier, I was able to relax and drive!
Yay for small victories!
This week my anxiety was unusually high due to multiple stresses in my personal and work life. The first being the decision on whether or not I am going to stay on my anxiety medication while pregnant or not. I spent a lot of time ruminating on it, which wasn’t helpful, and as a result I became incredibly anxious for several days. Normally I am able to except the fact that I will struggle with anxiety my entire life, however, this week it has made me incredibly angry. I just wished that I didn’t have to make the decision and I was just “normal” and only had to worry about getting morning sickness. Not spiraling into panic attacks every day.
The other reason why I was anxious was because the standard I was teaching in my 7th grade language arts class was incredibly difficult. My students struggled to learn it, however, when test day came around, they did an excellent job! I had no reason to be anxious on that front! They are a great group! YAY!
This weekend has allowed me a chance to step back from all the stress and just relax. I have been talking a lot with my husband and it feels good to know that he is here to support me – no matter what.
I just need to remember that God is with me and He will take care of me. I need to trust that I will make the right decision and give the rest to Him.
If you are struggling with anxiety, just remember that it is ok. Take some time for yourself to refocus and find relaxation. Eventually it will pass.