Finally! Feeling better!

After many months of being “intestinally” sick during my pregnancy, I am starting to recover. It turns out many of the problems were stemming from my anxiety medication. Ever since I switched meds, my stomach, and bowels, have been happy! It’s hard to believe such a simple change would make such a difference. I hate that I have to rely on medication to help with my anxiety during this pregnancy, but after much prayer and consultation, we decided that it is best for me to continue taking them. I truly believe that if my panic attacks came back, it would be harmful to my little girl. I have to make sure I am well so I can keep her safe and healthy. 

I am also finally seeing joy in this pregnancy! She is 26 weeks now and each day her kicks get stronger and stronger. It’s a pretty bizzare feeling, actually, to have a little human beating (with love) my insides, but I love it! I actually only got a few hours of sleep last night because she was up the whole time playing the bongos on my bladder! It was hard to stay mad, even if I was exhausted at work today. 

I am still a bit nervous about delivery, but not as much as I use to be. I had a lot of anxiety and panic about it in the past, but now I am starting to see it as an exciting nervousness. You know what I mean? I’m not at all looking forward to the pain of the contractions, but I can’t wait to finally hold her in my arms! 

It’s starting to get real!! ❤️

Oh, pregnancy! You’re embarrassing!

Well I am halfway through! I have hit the 20 week mark! I still am having “morning sickness” aka all day sickness, which I was hoping would be gone by now. I have not been as nauseous as I was in the first trimester, but I still throw up a few times a week. 

I have decided that instead of being overly self conscious or embarrassed about my changing body, I have decided to embrace it, and laugh at it! From peeing when I laugh/sneeze/cough, to having room-clearing gas, I am been trying to see the bright side of it. At first, I really struggled with my body, but now I just realize it’s part of the journey! 

What are some of your most embarrassing pregnancy moment? 

11 weeks!

Wow! I don’t know how it has happened, but I am 11 weeks pregnant! Apparently, my baby is around the size of a lime! That seems huge to me, considering they just a few weeks ago it was a poppy seed! 

I actually found that today I had a lot of energy, and that hasn’t happened in weeks. I was able to get through work without crashing immediately when I got home. 

I am still throwing up in the mornings (boo), but my nausea doesn’t last all day anymore. I seem to finally be experiencing a little bit of relief. I am hoping and praying that it will end soon!

Oh! And I have ZERO anxiety! I haven’t had much at all since I got pregnant. I was really worried that it would get really bad, but it seems to have disappeared, and for that, I am thankful! 

Cheers to week 11 and ZERO anxiety! 

Thank you! Oh, and I hate morning sickness…

Thank you to all of you for the love and support over the news of our upcoming baby! It still feels surreal to know that I growing a little human inside of me! Creepy and awe-inspiring! 

Morning sickness (aka ALL DAY SICKNESS) has really taken me out! It stirs up a bit of anxiety because I hate getting sick in public. I am taking some anti-nausea meds, and it has been helping, but I only have so many pills a month so I am trying to ration them. What did you do when dealing with morning sickness? 

News I have been waiting to share!!

I have been absent from WordPress for awhile, and that is because I am no good at keeping secrets! I can finally announce that I AM PREGNANT! 8 weeks! We had our first ultrasound on Thursday and I fell in love with my little blur. 

I am very thankful that we have made it to 8 weeks, because, as you know, we suffered a miscarriage in March at 6 weeks. I have been very cautious with my excitement, but I am grateful for every moment! 

I have been very sick the last few weeks and I didn’t expect that. I knew morning sickness would happen, but it is all day long! Whenever I feel frustrated with the nausea, I remind myself that the baby is healthy. 

Anyway!! I am so happy I am able to let you guys know! 

How to you handle TTCing?

Since my husband and I started trying to get pregnant again after our miscarriage, I am having a hard time NOT over analyzing! Every cramp, gas bubble, and twinge is analyzed and spun to be a pregnancy symptom. HELP! I have two more days until “Aunt Flow” is due, and I honestly feel insane. 

How do you all handle the terrible two week wait?! 

Pregnancy after miscarriage?

It has been just over two months since my miscarriage and we are talking about trying to get pregnant again. At the end of this week, I will be ovulated (sorry for the TMI) and we are discussing whether or not to try this month. I had originally said that I wanted to start trying again this month, but now that it is here I am kinda nervous. Before the miscarriage my baby fever was at a roaring boil, and all I could think about was having one. I had babies on the brain. However, now that we have been trough the miscarriage, I feel gun-shy and a little afraid of babies. I am in need of some advice, since all of this is new to me. 

For those of you who have had miscarriages, how were you able to move on and try again? Was it difficult for you? 

2 Straight Days!

I have had two straight anxiety free days!! 

Since getting pregnant, I have felt, oddly, emotionally stable. Normally I experience nearly every emotion known to woman kind within three hours of waking up. However, I have been able to stay even-keel for two entire days! (This does NOT include moments when I am hungry.) 

Yay for anxiety free days! 

Baby on the Brain

Over the last few months, I have written a few posts about my baby fever. With work back in full swing, after an amazing summer off, baby fever took a back seat. However, last night I had a dream that we were pregnant and the fever is back with a renewed vitality! To take the edge off, I have been pinning baby articles on Pinterest and watching Netflix.

We are talking about starting to try for a baby when the New Year comes around, and I have to admit that with the excitement, there is nervousness. Like, what happens to my anxiety when I go off my medication? What if I am sick the whole time? Will labor be 24 hours long? These are the questions that go through my head as the new year gets closer and closer.

For all you mothers out there, how did you handle the fears of pregnancy and motherhood? Was there any way you helped calm your fears? And also, what do you do when you have an anxiety disorder and you’re pregnant?

Thank you for your support!!

Graduation and Babies!

For the last two years, by husband has been working on getting his Master’s degree, and on Wednesday, HE FINISHED IT! I am so proud of him and all the dedication he devoted to his degree. It was a difficult two years, for both of us, but now we are on the other side and it was totally worth it! A whole new chapter of our lives has started! We can spend more time just hanging out together and enjoy growing closer without any distractions.

Over the last few days, we have actually been talking about something very exciting and life changing! Having a BABY!! I have posted in the past about my baby fever that has been raging for months! However, my darling husband has never really caught the fever until recently! I think it because he can no think of anything other than his homework. No that his mind can relax and think about the other things he wants in his life, he is able to think about expanding our family!! Today we talked about when we should start trying and when we would ideally (we know we can’t plan everything) we would like to have it! Oh my goodness! It is so exciting!

I still am worried about how my anxiety will react to pregnancy, but I am continuing to do research and talk about options with my doctor. I want to be sure that I am healthy and fit so that I can provide the best home for my little baby! 🙂

I will keep you updated on how the process if going! I cannot wait to share it all with you guys!