I just wanted to take this time to thank all of you for all the support and kindness you have given me on this blog as I have revealed some of my darkest moments to you. In the beginning, I wanted to be sure to be completely honest in hopes that I could help at least one person no longer feel like they were traveling this anxious road alone. Had I been able to find that one person, maybe I could have come to terms with my anxiety sooner. Regardless of how I discovered my own disorder, I do not regret anything that I have gone through in the past because it has made me who I am today, and I have been able to use these experiences to share with all of you!
Thank you again for being so kind and loving! You continually give me strength to share my journey with all those who need to hear it.
In the two months since I have started down this road of healing, I have rediscovered so much about myself that I had forgotten. It feels so empowering to be able to feel other emotions and think thoughts that are completely unrelated to anxiety. My mind was so twisted up in an anxious whirlwind that I was unable to think of much else besides my anxiety. However, much of my mind is freed from the chains of worry and now roams free in the newfound land of peace and contentment.
I am also rediscovering passions that had been tossed aside long ago, such as writing and even simple conversations with new people at the grocery store. I’m no longer focused on getting through the store as fast as I can, I am able to chat with others and bond over shared laughter. It’s astonishing.
My commitment to my emotional health has been the best decision I have made in a long time. Along with taking a small dosage of medication to help balance out the functionality of my brain, I also make sure I practice yoga 5 times a week, I set aside time to spend doing a bible study, and I try to be more open with my family and friends about what I’m thinking and feeling. I also have loved blogging, because it allows me to take the thoughts that are bouncing around my head, and put them somewhere concrete. It also is so encouraging that so many of you have enjoyed my writings and have left such wonderful comments!
I have been open with you all about how I struggle with the frustration of dealing with anxiety for the rest of my life, but I want to share with you something one of my students said to me that changed my outlook. They told me that people cannot truly enjoy the good days without the bad days. We, as human beings, cannot fully comprehend happiness without sadness. I thought that was an amazing statement. It really spoke to me. I am going to try and remember that during the the times I feel the most frustration.
Remember, find the happiness in every day!