Success!!

NO ANXIETY! NO ARGUING! NO BABY MELTDOWNS!! The first day of our road trip was a success! It was a great family experience for the three of us!

Today we reach Our Destination in Colorado, so we are ready for another day of adventure! Everything is packed and ready bright and early! We have a pit stop about half way through at my husband’s aunt’s ranch where my daughter will have a chance to run around and explore!

Prayers for safe travels and family bonding! I will keep you updated!

Push Yourself

Push yourself! I learned this today when decided to hike a few hundred feet up the side of a mountain today! I have had a huge fear of heights ever since I was a kid, and I never was a huge hiker either. So when my husband suggested that we hike up the mountain today, I wasn’t sure. A part of me wanted to push myself past my boundaries, and the other part of me was screaming “NO!” However, I went with the boundary pushing part of myself, and I am so glad I did! We literally crawled, scooted, and climbed ourselves to the top! By the time we reached the top, I was exhausted but I was so grateful that I did it!

I learned that I am stronger than I thought I was, and it is incredibly cool to learn! I love that I have the courage now I go beyond my limits and find out what I am made of! 🙂

More Adventures!

Today was a really fun day. However, I have to admit that I was a little Anxious in the morning, because there wasn’t a set plan before we set out. I was apprehensive because I like to mentally prepare for what is to come, but, as it turns out, I am glad we didn’t have a plan! It was a wonderful day of shopping and exploring! 

Bittersweetly back home

it is always difficult leaving my family back in Ohio and coming back home to Arizona. We are such a close family and it is so hard to be separated by so many hundreds of miles. However, this trip was fantastic and I loved being able to spend quality time with them. My husband was able to go back to my hometown and see my extended family again and enjoy being gushed over. He hadn’t been back for the last two years. It was hard for him to get to Ohio while he was getting his masters. 

As difficult as it is to say goodbye, I love the life I have built out here in Arizona. I feel like I have flourished into the woman God has designed me to be, and there are have been so many wonderful things out here. My husband. My career. My friends. And of course my dogs! 

Technology has made a huge difference because whenever I miss my parents or brother, I can FaceTime them or just shoot them a text! 

Here are some pictures of my husband and I traveling back to Arizona yesterday! 

   
 

Sleep snob!

The redeye flight my husband and I went on tonight (or morning now) wasn’t too terrible. However it was difficult to sleep! I wiggled back and fourth, and back and forth! I couldn’t find a comfortable position and I kept getting hot! LOL! I have learned that I am a “sleep snob”!
Here is my husband as he woke up as we landed! I had fun waking him up! 

  

Prays for safe travel and anxiety

Tomorrow my husband and I are heading to Ohio to visit my family! I am so excited! I love going home to visit and hang out with my family and friends! YAY!

As for the anxiety side of things: I am doing extremely well! I have ZERO anxiety! I only feel pure, unadultered excitement! However, my husband is experiencing a lot of anxiety because he does not enjoying flying. His anxiety really manifested itself today because he was cleaning abd rearranging nearly everything. He experiences a lot of anxiety when his routine is altered or he feels out of control. Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers. I want him to enjoy his time and most importantly be at peace. 

OH! On a positive note! I got new luggage today ! 

  

Emotionally drained

Today was a very emotionally draining day. This morning I got a call from my father letting me know my grandma had passed away last night. She was 92 and had lived a very full life, so I am happy for the life she was able to live. She was a very strong woman and had taken up leadership roles and took part in politics when that was not something women did. She did not let her gender keep her from doing what she wanted. She followed her passions and made her way in life, no matter what anyone said. I have lots of fun memories with my grandma and I will always treasure them.

I hate that I am so far from my family during this time, and I wish there was more I could do to help. So in the mean time, I am sending out my prayers and continuing to call/text to be emotionally supportive to my father.

On a slight deviation from my grandmother, my emotional day continued when I came seconds away from relapsing into another panic attack. Currently I am out of town at At a work conference, so I do not have my own vehicle. We have been given a huge white van to drive and none of us have much experience driving large vehicles. The woman who drove it, whom I am thankful for, did a good job handling it, but we got stuck in horrendous traffic. We are not use to traffic because own town is tiny so we never think about those sorts of delays. Two of my panic arrack triggers is traffic jams and feeling sick. While we were stuck in the traffic, I started to get car sick! Both of my triggers were occurring at the same time and I started to feel my body slip into the beginning stages of panic. My arms went numb and I started to get real hot and fidgety. I closed my eyes and tried to stay positive, and I also told my close friend who happened to be one of the ladies on this trip with me. She then tried to encourage me and helped me take my mind off the encroaching panic. We ended up being stuck In traffic for over an hour and a half. Our trip was only 18 miles… However, the best part is that I never did have that panic attack!

Needless to say, I feel very emotionally drained from the death of my grandmother and fighting off the panic attack. Tomorrow is a new day and I will see it in a new light. Grandma is in a wonderful place and has been reunited with the love of her life! And my panic was beaten and I can do it again if I need to!!

Goodnight!

Out of Town!

I am out of town for another training these next few days and it feels good to be somewhere new. It has been a lot of fun being apart of all these grants where I get to travel  around Arizona. It is a great experience because last year at this time I was badly able to think about going 20 minutes in the car because of my anxiety. What a difference a year makes! Cheers to being healthy!